Couples Counseling and Marriage Therapy in San Luis Obispo
Strengthen Trust, Closeness, and Connection
You want to feel like a team again. But lately, it’s been harder to talk without tension or connect without effort. Under the surface, something’s missing: trust that your relationship is solid, the comfort of being understood and appreciated, or the closeness that makes you feel like you’re truly in it together.
Couples counseling helps you shift out of reactive cycles and into meaningful connection. You’ll learn to communicate with care, listen with empathy, and build a foundation that is steady and supportive so your relationship feels like home again.
I see couples in person in San Luis Obispo and online across California, Washington, Florida, and South Carolina.
Common Challenges Couples Bring to Therapy
Couples come to therapy for many reasons. Some are in crisis, while others simply want to feel closer and communicate better before small problems become big ones. I help couples with:
- Recurring arguments and communication breakdowns: getting unstuck from the same fights
- Emotional disconnection or drifting apart: when partners feel lonely or more like roommates
- Infidelity and affair recovery: working through grief and rebuilding trust after betrayal
- Substance abuse: addressing its impact on trust, intimacy, and boundaries
- Intimacy and desire differences: mismatched libido, loss of spark, or sexual shame
- Premarital counseling: strengthening your foundation and learning research-based tools for lasting love
- Major life transitions: becoming parents, empty nesting, career changes, retirement, or illness
- Co-parenting and blended family stressors: balancing loyalty, parenting styles, and stepfamily dynamics
- ADHD and neurodiversity in relationships: supporting couples to create better communication and mutual understanding
- Financial betrayal and money conflicts: hidden spending, debt, or secrecy around finances
Whatever you’re facing, couples therapy can help you find new ways to understand each other and reconnect.
What to Expect in Your First Three Couples Therapy Sessions
Starting therapy can feel like a big step. Knowing what the first few sessions look like can help you feel more comfortable and prepared.
Before We Begin: Gottman Relationship Checkup
Before our first session, each of you will complete the Gottman Relationship Checkup, a secure online questionnaire. It highlights your strengths as a couple and the areas that need support, giving us a roadmap for your therapy.
Session 1: Getting the Big Picture
In our first session, we'll talk about how your relationship began, what’s been challenging lately, and what you’re hoping will change. This first meeting is about understanding your story and getting a clear sense of where communication or connection has broken down.
Session 2: Individual Conversations
I’ll meet with each of you one-on-one for 25 minutes. These conversations help me understand your personal and relational history, the experiences that shaped how you show up in love, and any triggers or sensitivities I should be aware of so I can support you both effectively.
Session 3: Feedback + Goals
We’ll go over the Checkup results together, talk through the key themes, and decide what to focus on first. Together, we’ll set clear therapy goals so our work feels focused and meaningful.
Moving Forward
After those first three sessions, we’ll dive into practical, research-based tools to strengthen your relationship.
Gottman Relationship Checkup
The Relationship Checkup is an in-depth online assessment designed to highlight the strengths, struggles, and patterns in your relationship.
Here’s what you’ll get:
✔️ A 10-page, detailed report highlighting your unique strengths and challenges
✔️ Insights into the key areas that matter most: communication, conflict, intimacy, trust, and emotional connection
✔️ Clear, practical tools based on 50+ years of relationship science to help you grow together instead of growing apart
Think of it like a GPS for your relationship, showing you exactly where you are and how to get where you want to go together.
Intensive Couples Therapy
If you're stuck in painful cycles, reeling from a breach of trust, or caught between “We love each other” and “We can’t keep doing this,” intensive therapy can help you get immediate traction.
This format gives your relationship focused time to make real change—fast. We meet for 4 hours over 1 or 2 days, equipping you with practical tools and skills you can start using right away. Research shows that grouping sessions upfront leads to faster relief, clearer communication, and higher relationship satisfaction.
Intensives are also a great option if you’re traveling from out of town. Many couples choose to spend a weekend in San Luis Obispo to step away from daily stressors and focus fully on their relationship.
Whether you're facing a crisis, at a turning point, or simply need a jumpstart, I’ll guide you through structured, research-based conversations. Together we'll interrupt unproductive patterns, repair emotional wounds, and rebuild trust, connection, and communication.
Feel Like a Team Again
When you’re stuck in the same arguments or drifting apart, therapy can help you turn toward each other. Together we’ll uncover what’s behind your patterns, learn new ways to communicate, and reconnect. Book your first session to get started.